Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Invitation only (2009)


Reviewed by Cigarette Smoking Man A
I'll be frank. I used to love Maria Ozawa's porn. Back in the days when she still do amateur-ish porn, not the filth that involves golden showers, face-altering bukakke shots, bondage and the rest of the other extreme stuff she does with her punani nowadays. After being toppled by Rio on the JAV charts, another Eurasian that looks even more beautiful than Maria (Hey, AV idols can be beautiful too, you obnoxious jackass) she resorts to doing really hardcore stuff to appeal to a specific porn niche, the extreme type. Not extreme by American standards, but by japanese standards. So when I heard she's appearing in mainstream movies, the old ones being an Indonesian movie Menculik Miyabi, I was pretty curious to see how she fare without exposing her jiggly bits and only relying on her acting skills. So when watching the movie with her scene in it, oh silly me, why would I even consider her to have sufficient acting skills when the scenes involves her fucking another guy??! Again!? Fuck, I might as well stop watching this movie and put on her porn instead. But I digress.

This movie, aside from having Maria Ozawa, have plentiful of really hot women in it. From the start we are introduced to a sorry-ass loser Wade (Jerry Huang) who works as a chauffeur to a rich CEO, Yang (Jerry Huang). While taking a break, he accidently stumbled upon his boss banging Maria Ozawa (Again!) at the backseat of the car. Days later, after much awkwardness, his boss invited him to go to a party of the rich and famous on his behalf since he might be busy, fully aware of loser's financial capability and non-existing fashion sense, he offered him money and suit to go to the party. In the party, everything is permitted, gambling, hot women, the whole works, so you can imagine our boy's surprise when he was told he can have anything he ever wanted. All he needs to do is write on a card provided. Moments later, sure enough, our loser gets laid with Maria (Again!!) and got a new sportscar in return! Wow. Only in the movies, mate. Only in movies.

Not long, our loser realized there's a price to be paid for obtaining all these luxury when they are suddenly stalked by a masked murderer. Not only he thats being targeted, a bunch of other were as well. Then it dawn upon them that this party was planned with them as the main event, and torturing them one by one is the highlight of the evening. The mood and feel of the movie pretty much emulates American teen slasher movies. You have the dilapidated warehouse, you have the masked psycho, you have a bunch of incompetent git who gets themselves killed all the time. Its like a rehash of all American slashers, mix together with a dab of asian production and the result is a half-ass Taiwanese slasher that copies all slasher movies. The only upside of the movie is that its the first torture porn movie in its country, but to the rest of us, mehh..I would give them kudos for trying out something new for the taiwanese film industry but the movie is such a mix-mash of American slashers without a tinge of originality, you just sort of feel disappointed they had a chance to introduce something new for their country but didn't fully utilize it. Download here.

(because of all the hot women, minus 1 if you are a woman)

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